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| © 2015 Don Arday. |
Calligraphy
Noun
1. letterforms that have to be drawn rather than selected;
2. something only one in every 22,583 graphic designers
knows how to do;
3. a fancy word for the lost art of handwriting.
Usage: “The reason
your calligraphy looks so stiff is you are using too much wrist and not enough
elbow.”
Canvas
Noun
1. a closely woven cloth used as a support for painted
illustrations so they can be worn by the illustrator;
2. a useful material for unsuccessful fine artists in need
of shelter;
3. a prime subject that’s a bit of a stretch for most
illustrators;
Verb
4. a term describing the actions of an illustrator making
cold calls in search of a commission.
Client: “Do you mind
if I ask why you chose to illustrate this assignment on a 6 foot x 9 foot
canvas?” Illustrator: “So I didn’t
have to use small brushes to paint the scene.” Client: “That makes sense.” Illustrator: “And, when the image is reduced it won’t show any canvas texture.”
Client: “Oh, I get it. How do you intend
on reducing it?” Illustrator: “I’ll
have it digitally photographed, then I’ll convert it into a Photoshop file. After
that I can fix the color, touch up sections that need it, edit the composition,
and add all the characters and objects.”
Professor: “Class, in
Senior Advanced Painting we will be working exclusively on canvas.” Student
A: “What’s that?” Student B: “Where can we get some?” Student C: “Try JoAnn Fabrics or Hobby Lobby.”
Usage: “Paint the
illustration on canvas, digitally photograph it, then find a service bureau
that can print it out for you on canvas.”
Caricature
Noun
1. what most realistic portraits turn out to be;
2. a figurative interpretation by an illustrator that
displays a juvenile sense of humor, a sadistic tendency, an irrational state of
mind, or a lack of drawing ability;
3. a visual “the jokes on you”;
4. art that exaggerates the defects and peculiarities of a
person while simultaneously displaying the defects and peculiarities of the
artist creating it.
Usage: “Well if you
want that face to be a caricature you’ll have to either stretch it vertically
or expand it horizontally; make the eyes bigger or make them smaller; render
the nose pointier or make it bulbous, thin out the lips or puff them up, add more
forehead or take some away, expand the chin or shrink it up, but the ears
off limits, unless you are doing Ross Perot, Lyndon Johnson, Yoda, or Mike Tyson.”
Usage: “That
caricature of Elen Degeneres looks exactly like Judy Dench.”
Cartoon
Noun
1. a drawing that is meant to be funny, as opposed to a
caricature, which is usually quite sad (see above);
2. a nonsensical illustrated story with some sort of furry
animal in it;
3. a representation more real than reality… really;
4. something an illustrator never wants their illustration
to be called.
Usage: “When it comes to the cartoon, Thomas Nast was good, but the greatest cartoonist of all time was Picasso.”
Usage: “The age of the
cartoon has past. We are now in the age of the animated film.”
Cast Shadow
Noun
1. a three-dimensional phenomenon that makes no sense on a
two dimensional surface;
2. a moody client;
3. a comic book hero no one has ever seen.
Usage: “In order for
you to have a cast shadow in that illustration there needs to be something
there to cast it.”
Usage: “Although
you've illustrated a tall slender man, that cast shadow belongs to a dwarf.”
Casein
Noun
1. a word that breaks the “i before e except after c” rule;
2. an art medium no artist knows anything about;
3. 18th century gesso.
Usage: “Just because casein
is made of from cow’s milk doesn’t mean you can drink it, I’d stick to swilling
watercolor.”
Charcoal
Noun
1. a drawing medium that leaves more pigment on the artist
than on his or her art;
2. a substance that can be used either for creating art or
for burning it;
3. something that leaves a filthy mess on a scanner.
Client: “I wasn’t
expecting the illustration to be completed with charcoal.” Illustrator: “I
often use charcoal when I’m depressed.” Client: “That’s the problem, those
doves look like ravens. I’m afraid I can't approve the illustration.”
Illustrator: “Poe would have.”
Usage: “Even though
it’s called vine charcoal that doesn’t mean you can only draw plants with it.”
Usage: “If any student
is using charcoal to draw the figure, everyone must wear a respirator, even
the model.”
Chiaroscuro
Noun
1. a cool art term that one learns in art school;
2. a drawing technique used mostly to create shadows;
3. a brand of clothing worn by reps and hipsters.
Usage: “I admire you,
your lifestyle is so chiaroscuro.”
Usage: “I think those
eggs you are cooking need a bit more chiaroscuro on them.”
Chroma
Noun
1. the shinny trim on an art rep’s Jaguar;
2. a term used to describe color that draws a blank stare
from an artist;
3. a measure of intensity used to describe the degree of
anger in a client’s face.
Illustrator A: “You
know, I was talking to that dolt, Illustrator C, about the chroma in the color
palette he uses, and he thought I was referring to the intensity of the
colors.” Illustrator B: “Well weren’t
you?” Illustrator A: “Hell no, I was
talking about his stainless steel palette, what a dunce.”
Usage: “The best way
of standing up for yourself with your clients is to show more chroma.”
Cissing
Noun
1. what happens to watery paint when it is applied to a
vertical surface;
2. a popular form of photo bombing in the 1980’s known as
streaking;
Verb
3. another form of booing or casting insults.
Usage: “Oh yes, it’s a
well known fact that. You couldn’t be called an illustrator in the 1960’s if
your work didn’t have any cissing.”
Cliché
Noun
1. any illustration with a heart or a star in it;
2. a spot illustration in USA Today;
3. the first suggestion a client has on an assignment.
Usage: “He has used
the same composition so many times that he has rights to his own cliché.”
Client
Noun
1. a blessing and a curse;
2. a person or persons who hire an illustrator to do an
illustration, but don’t trust that they can do it;
3. a class of people who believe themselves above other
classes of people.
Usage: “My latest
client is my kind of client, she won’t meet with me, speak with me by phone,
communicate with me through email, or even acknowledge my existence. She has an
assistant.”
Cold Pressed
Noun
1. an attitude displayed by certain illustration professors;
2. a method of distilling truly excellent, illustration inspiring, grain spirits;
3. the type of illustration board used mainly by
illustrators located in northern climates;
Verb
4. for a client to have forced an illustrator to make
changes to a finished illustration.
Usage: “Wow, that
board is so cold pressed it’s got a toothache.”
Usage: “The grain on a
good cold pressed surface can separate the bristles from a brush.”
Collage
Noun
1. when a client hires a marketing firm that hires an
advertising agency that hires a design studio that hires an illustrator;
2. the result of a heavy handed client interfering with an
illustration concept;
3. a work of art resulting from an inability on the part of
the artist to make up his or her mind;
4. art composed of elements not created by the artist creating
the art.
Usage: “There are a
lot of illiterate would be illustrators out there who think there is no reason
to attend a collage.”
Color
Noun
1. a scheme that can get one into a world of trouble;
2. an element in an illustration that has the potential to
make it interesting;
3. something when applied digitally that never quite turns out
right;
4. a facial characteristic of an enraged client.
Client: “I want you to
use Pantone’s color of the year in the illustration.” Illustrator: “You mean this years color?” Client: “No, I want the one they’ll choose for next
year, otherwise the illustration will be so last year.”
Usage: “I see you have
the ability to imagine a world without color.”
Commission
Noun
1. a roundabout way of making money;
2. a carrot at the end of a stick to a donkey;
3. a group of non-artists who pass judgment on artists;
Verb
4. a procedure a client uses to torture an illustrator.
Art Director: “I have
a commission for you.” Illustrator: “A
nice budget?” Art Director: “Well
actually it’s more of a proposition.” Illustrator: “A comfortable timeframe?” Art Director: “As I think about it, I would say it’s really a proposal.”
Illustrator: “It’s high profile right?” Art
Director: “Let’s say it’s an
opportunity.” Illustrator: “Lots of
creative freedom?” Art Director: “It
would be a favor.” Illustrator: “It’s
a freebie, right?” Art Director: “Well
why would you think it would be anything else?”
Usage: “Congratulations,
you were awarded the commission. As I see it, you have the commission, but
you’ll never get the award.”
Complementary
Adjective
1. the state of two artists in discussion about each others
work;
2. the rare instance when a client and an illustrator happen to have the same
points of view;
3. a type of verbiage used by students in class critiques;
Illustrator A: “I
really like the use of color in your illustration.” Illustrator B: “Nice of you to say so.” Illustrator A: “But I feel your composition is quite
disturbing.” Illustrator B: “Oh yeah, how so?” Illustrator A: “Well I don’t know.” Illustrator B: “Oh, you don’t know?”
Illustrator A: “Well maybe I feel that
way because it needs something complementary. As it stands now, I can’t tell
the difference between the sky and the water, so I can’t tell if the ants are
swimming or flying.”
Usage: “Your complementary
colors are pigmentary.”
Composition
Noun
1. something a designer calls a design;
2. when two or more things are depicted on one surface;
3. a skill not very many artists are good at.
Usage: “A good
composition is the result of a single-minded determination and dedication to an
anarchistic distrust in rules.”
Concept
Noun
1. an abstract idea that can be realistic;
2. a scheme usually used to get one out of actually doing
any work;
3. someting not at all achievable through ideation;
3. a thing a client has no concept of;
Verb
1. an improper use of the word.
Usage: (Proper) “Concept
is a sacred deity that only the most devout artists can summon.”
Usage: (Proper) “Imagine,
a client paying for a job the moment it’s delivered…now that’s a concept.”
Usage: (Improper) “Son,
you need to go and concept you up a piture.”
Concept Art
Noun
1. art that never is completed;
2. an idea that is trying to resemble art;
3. non-objective art;
4. something previously thought to be part of all
illustrations.
Director: “Do you think you could concept art with a scene
where our heroine can be seen but at the same time not seen?” Artist: “Do you
want me to render her into it?” Director: “Sure, just as long as she can’t
be seen.” Artist: “Where do you think I should not put her?” Director:
“Anywhere no one will be able to find her.”
Usage: “Don’t you dare
call that an illustration, it’s concept art.”
Configuration
Noun
1. see composition.
Usage: “That
configuration isn't quite a composition.”
Connoisseur
Noun
1. someone who believes themselves to be an expert on art
without ever having done any;
2. an extremely judgmental person;
3. a person who shows great appreciation for something by
disliking it.
Illustrator A: “The
judges of the Society of Illustrators Competition are real connoisseurs.”
Illustrator B: “Of Art and Illustration.”
Illustrator A: “No…of beer, and I’m not so
sure about that.”
Conté
Noun
1. a red-brown sanguine crayon used to render blood;
2. French charcoal;
3. the only medium a first-year art student is allowed to
use.
Usage: “If you keep
drawing with that much pressure you’re going to snap that conté like a
toothpick.”
Contemporary
Adjective
1. a descriptive term that never goes out of date even if
what it is describing does;
2. art and illustration produced back in 1950;
Noun
3. someone who is as old as you are, no matter what age that
is;
4. all fashion illustration, no matter when it was done.
Usage: “Today’s
contemporary hipsters are chill, the one’s in the 1950’s were only cool.”
Context
Noun
1. a thing every illustration shouldn’t be without;
2. a circumstance that causes monetary fluctuations in the
cost of an illustration;
3. a determining factor that may have to do with a client
and have nothing whatsoever to do with the illustrator or illustration.
Director: “I would
like our heroine to be at the bottom of that well you’ve drawn in the
background there.” Artist: “Since the
inside of the well can’t be seen, how will anyone know she’s actually in the
well?” Director: “Because it is in
context with her not being seen.” A while later… Artist: “I think I know what you mean. She shouldn’t
be seen because she’s not in the scene yet.” Director: “Oh no, she’s definitely in the scene, but
she’s not to be seen. You see?” A while later… Director: “I was looking at that well you drew and I
thought I saw her.” Artist: “But I
didn’t render her.” Director: “That
has nothing to do with whether she was there or not.”
Usage: “You should
have your wits about you when you are working in context.”
Contour
Noun
1. a line that behaves in an undisciplined manner;
2. the drawing equivalent of playing a guitar without
looking at the fret board, and no one but Blind Lemmon Jefferson, Blind Willie McTell or Jeff Healey can do that;
3. acknowledging the edge of ones drawing capabilities.
Usage: “If you follow
the contour of the big toe you’ll find it leads to the edge of the foot, which
follows the ankle contour leading to the calf, then the thigh continues around
the buttocks to the lower torso, which joins the upper torso with the shoulder, that
extends to the neck and transitions to the jaw line which leads to the facial
profile, that extends to the hair form which is all supported by the hair tie.”
Contraposition
Noun
1. see composition.
Usage: “That
composition isn't quite a contraposition.”
Contrast
Noun
1. a way to make something visible when it shouldn’t be;
2. a phenomena that occurs when a black drawing implement is
placed in contact with a white drawing surface;
3. a state of détente between illustrator and client.
Director: “It seems it's that
lack of contrast that is keeping our heroine from being visible.” Artist: “I thought that would be the best way to
keep her from being seen.” Director: “Fundamentally
your thinking is good, but now Finblat the grey dwarf can’t be seen either.”
Artist: “I thought Finblat had died by
the time this scene occurs.” Director: “Finblat
is only ‘supposed‘ to have died, but he is actually still alive and a part of
this scene, even if he’s not supposed to be seen.” Artist: “So he didn’t die, but he is not to be seen in
this scene.” Director: “I don’t know
why you are having such a hard time understanding this, Finblat is invisible.”
Artist: “I insist that I still get paid
for not rendering him.”
Usage: “Contrast
provides visibility, a lack of contrast hides mistakes.”
Creative
Adjective
1. a word designers often mistake for a noun;
2. what most artist’s believe themselves to be;
3. describing a person who is forced to only use the right side of
his or her brain because they don’t have a left side.
Usage: “Now I’m a
creative. Yeah, I’m a creative. Not a trace, of doubt in my mind. I’m in love, I’m a creative. Said I’m a creative, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m a
creative, yeah, yeah, yeah…”
Usage: “Let me put on
my thinking cap, it prevents the left side of my brain from interfering with a
creative challenge.”
Creative Cloud
Noun
1. Adobe a.k.a. God and heaven;
2. a scheme for monitoring the creation of all art, first
conceived in Stalinist Russia;
3. a non-religious form of tithing.
Usage: “Hey hey! you
you! Get off of my creative cloud. Don’t hang around ‘cause two’s a crowd. Oh
my creative cloud, baby…”
Usage: “#$@&%*$#&*@!
creative cloud!”
Crosshatching
Noun
1. the way an illustrator renders a tablecloth with napkins;
2. a drawing method that uses twice as much lead as
necessary.
Usage: “If you insist
on scribbling, at least try to make it look like crosshatching.”
Curvilinear
Noun
1. a circulating joke;
2. any line, shape, form, article of clothing, object, or
architectural structure that doesn’t consist of a straight line;
3. a term that makes artists feel as thought they have some
sort of scientific knowledge.”
Usage: “That curvilinear
form is contaminated with straight lines.”
Usage: “You do the
hokey pokey, and you curvilinear yourself around, and that’s what it’s all
about!”
For the letter A see The Illustrator’s Confidential Dictionary:
http://www.theinformedillustrator.com/2013/06/the-illustrators-confidential.html
For the letter B see The Illustrator’s Genuwhine Dictionary:
http://www.theinformedillustrator.com/2014/01/the-illustrators-genuwhine-dictionary.html
Acknowledgements
http://www.theinformedillustrator.com/2013/06/the-illustrators-confidential.html
For the letter B see The Illustrator’s Genuwhine Dictionary:
http://www.theinformedillustrator.com/2014/01/the-illustrators-genuwhine-dictionary.html
Acknowledgements
I’d like to acknowledge the following individuals who provided inspiration for this project. G.K.C., L.T., B.A., B.D., B.H., J.P., G.H., B.F., and T.L.
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